It is one of those days that I get into a super depressing mode. To make it worse, today is Monday. And, I am wearing all black.
Most of the times, I cannot really put a finger to why I am depressed.
Sometimes, it is just that time of the month. Here are some reasons that may cause me to go into a totally depressed mode:
1) That time of the month when I get bloated and feeling all crampy + pimples.
Oh gosh ! I can tolerate the former but not the pimples. They make me feel really ugly...
2) When things do not go my way
I am someone who have very few wishes in life. I aim high and work for it ... but u know, there are things that you cannot really work for . Thus , at times, I really wish hard for a certain something and even though I know it may be impossible to achieve, I still get pulled down when it hits me in the face that the answer is 'no'.
3) When I feel I have not been spending quality time with the spouse.
During our busy days, it is sometimes tough to have quality time with each other. There was once when it lasted a week - besides dinner time , we would be busy rushing through our work that we just have to bring home. I get really depressed when that happens. Thank god it does not happen often!
4) When prayers go unanswered.
Well, being a normal human, I do get frustrated and irritated when things do not change no matter how much faith I put in my prayers. But I know this is just the devils doing their work. There are many reasons why prayers go unanswered. Most times, it lies within ourselves. A common cliche is " God makes you wait for better things" . Honestly, I believe so much in that although sometimes, I can really kick myself in the head for thinking otherwise . Astaghfirullah.
5) When someone angers me at work.
Ok , this is more of an anger management issue rather than depression issue. A bit out of the topic ... heh...
I have been trying my best to control my feelings and emotions when 'depression' seems to strike. I definitely have never gone into any real depression (that's a very serious case!) but feeling as if the whole world is unfair is quite enough to irritate me and make me sad.
Quoting a friend recently, " Perhaps, you need to cleanse the soul."
Yeah , I agree. I have not been doing much religiously except for the mandatory requirements. It is time to increase that . .. InsyaAllah (if God permits), that will help to calm me down and makes it easier whenever I float into this mode again.
What would you do when you are depressed? Eat chocolates, go on a shopping spree (oooh...I love this!), have a movie marathon, go to the beach.... which one?