I have been rather quiet the past two hours. Hubby is just next to me , making a lot of noise while trying to finish up his CCA report. But I have not talked to him at all.

I am feeling melancholic. Or sad. Or just plain oblivious.

I think it is because of this coming Friday. The day when I'll see students again. The start of yet another year ahead , which would be full of projects , work and horrible , disgusting eyebags. I wouldn't say that I am not motivated to start work again ..just that ... I dun know... I think almost all teachers can emphatise with me at the moment.

On a happier note, I had a wonderful time with my ex-colleagues yesterday. It was kind of a last-minute decision to invite them over for lunch at my crib.BUt I sure am glad that we went thru it. I think ( no , I am EXTREMELY sure ) that no one regretted coming. I was really happy to be able to spend time chatting, gossipping , eating and laughing with them. Even the other half mentioned that I was glowing. We took numerous photos at the end of the day and I ( shamelessly ) admit that I looked good without any make - up ..because I was radiating with happiness....hahhaa...gosh ...I wish I am going back to sch , with them around me.

I shall try to perk myself up... I shall I shall....
It has been 2 mths or so since my last update.

It's the sch hols now which ,unfortunately though, will be ending in abt 2 weeks. Stupid shit lah . I seriously dun feel like going back to sch and face all those works again. NOt that I hate doing it but I somehow am getting used to the idea of staying at home . . :P

Anyway, I've got a nephew now. Yes , I am officially an auntie . haha. The baby's name is Mustaqim. He is so cute , so adorable and so so so fat now. I can never get enuff of him and keep snapping pictures of him whenever I go back to mummy's place. At home, I'll repeatedly look at his photos and talk abt him. Husby has even expressed his "jealousy" over my slight obsession. Haha...but husby darling , u know that u r the only man in my life ...:P

On the other hand, perhaps, it is just my maternal instinct that has kicked in. I have , on numerous ocassions, imagined having my own baby , cradling it to sleep , watching it grow...I have even talked to husby many times on how I picture life to be or how I would set rules and all that so that my future child will be nurtured well.We have even thought of some possible names, and it sometimes sends chill down my spine whenever I think of the possibility of not being able to get pregnant and all. At the moment, we are just letting nature takes its course. Insyallah , if God wills it , we would have a child to call our own. Hopefully, soon.

So .... it has been an eventful yr end hols. My darling underwent a knee surgery in mid-NOv and was pretty immobile for almost a month . He is now walking on crutches and it will probably take him another month or so to be able to walk as per normal. Kesian my sayang.... I couldn't imagine the pain he went thru in the initial days . Just lying on the sofa bed and not being able to move much must be one tough task for him as he had always been a very active person. Well, on one hand , he gets all the rest he deserves after all the work throughout the year.... otherwise, I can still imagine him working his butt off...CCA lah , meetings lah , SOW lah , Planning lah....

As for me, I think I kinda like it. Of course not the fact that he can't move and all. But I have grown accustomed to the fact that I wake up, attend to his needs, cook , do housework , chat with him , kiss him , hug him , kiss him again , hug again...dot dot dot !!! ( think Mamma Mia ... hehhee ) .. Well, some pple might have commented that it is really unfortunate that I am not able to go out and enjoy my hols, go on a trip or sthg before sch starts. On the contrary, I think this particular episode has brought me even closer to my husband. I am grateful to be able to be there for him in his time of needs and in a way , I feel myself improving as a wife.Insyaallah. I am now doing things that I never thought I would or be able to ... It may seem trivial to others but I have always, honestly, suffered from some kind of inferiority complex. I often thought very small of myself and had always been very afraid that I can never be a gd wife. Like stated, it is easy for a wife to go to heaven if she performs her wifey and religious duties faithfully. I am far from the target but at least now, I feel that I am able to do it, given more time. Insyaallah.

No one reads my blog anymore, I think . But I dun care. It feels good to ocassionally pen down my thoughts and feelings.

If u , my darling Husby, happens to read this anytime at all... I just want to say that you are a wonderful husband. May God bless you in this world and thereafter . You deserve the best and I hope I would be able to take care of you all your life. I love you , sayang.
I have always been very happy with the hubby. Alhamdulillah. Things have been great with him in my life. There is nothing more that I could ask for. He completes me, more than words can say .

Recently, we went thru some tough times. Fortunately , it was just for a while. BUt it caused both of us enough stress and worry , beyond what words can describe. Of course, I had to put on a positive front so as not to increase his level of stress. I am very glad it is all over now :)

I love him with all my heart and soul. When I walk down memory lane, I would smile or even snigger to myself. Who would have thought this is the man who would bring such light into my life ? Who would have expected a reserved, quiet , moody on the exterior kind of person would be the same one who makes me laugh non-stop all the time? He is super crazy , and I simply adore and am addicted to his craziness.

What happened recently is just another indication or proof , u may say, of how strong our love is.... :)

I shall end with my favourite phrase :

"Things happen for a reason".

Allah knows best.
Oh yeah...

The blog seems really dead by now. But I would not close it down for the mere reason that I just like to browse through the previous entries every now and then.

So what's up ? A lot of things. NOt really at the moment . But there have been a lot of things happening since my last entry. Just to update a lil (for whoever it is who reads this almost-extinct blg of mine)...

1) I have transferred to a new school.
2) I am still trying to get used to the whole new environment of new colleagues, new system , different breed of students etc etc .
3) My (Our) new house is almost ready ...I am so bloody excited with the whole transformation after the renovation. Hahaha.... It definitely looks very different from the previous interior design.
4) We are so looking forward to settling down in e new place. I'll probably start packing this weekend so that we can start moving our stuffs next week... We hope to fully move in by end of the month.

OK ..I 'd better get bck to work... must finish as much as possible before I go off.
I am in my room , on the bed...

The husby is on the floor...now he is at the dustbin...He is opening a new box of Colgate toothpaste.

My husby is very sexy ...hahahhaaa... luv many many :P
It has been a long time, yah? OH well...I have been tired almost everyday. School work is never ending. Married life is great , work life is not. I cannot imagine how i would be coping when we finally move house.

We are so lepak that we still have not started on house renovation when , in actual fact, we got the keys like more than a month back. I guess, staying with my family is pretty comfortable ( plus enjoyable at times ) afterall.... But we still want a place of our own lah.Now we r very confined to the bedroom except when we are marking at the dining table. The room is now like a walk-in store room... hahahha.... everything is inside. It's not nice....:P

On another note, yesterday marked the last day in Yuying. Well, not exactly since I am still conducting extra lessons during the hols. But yeah , basically I wun see most of my students anymore.Or my colleagues , except those in my departments.

Feeling? NOt emo, definitely. The only thing I would miss would be my close frens, the EAS pple and my dance girls + instructor. My close frens- I know I'll be missing them a lot but I guess, in life, pple come and go. I hope we would still be able to meet up and all. THe EAS pple - I doubt I can find pple as efficient and as nice as them. I really like ALL of them.... and of course, my Malay dance. I built it up - together with the dear instructor- and we have seen how the dance group grew over the year. I am gonna miss all the nonsense, the last-minute rushes, the make-up sessions, the adrenaline rush before every performance ( yeah , even when I am not the one performing.. ) Seriously , gonna miss all these. BUt it has been 5 years .It 's good to have a change. (next cca is drama though! woo hoo!)

Oh ... I forgot ! I would definitely miss my students... not all though :P

I hope the next sch I am going to would be better and provide a brighter future ...insya'allah. Deep down, I know I still wanna teach
It has been almost a month since my last entry. That would also mean it has been almost a month since I have become a MRS :)

It has all been very exciting. We are still trying to cope with the changes, e new demands , e huge need to balance love life n work life ... but no regrets , of course. What better things can I ask for ..when I have that man, perfect for me ....

It is Saturday and here we are, trying to do work. Both of us are at the dining table, with our laptops on..... yes, we are Trying very hard (with a capital T) not to get distracted...lol...

I just got my house keys. And guess what? The block just got repainted and it is so so so a fav colour of mine :-P

Or rather, tonight's e nite. Insyaallah, I'll be moving on to the next chapter of my life. So how am I feeling?

Like what the henna artist said, I am pretty cool. Of course I have the mini wedding jitters but I suppose I am pretty calm for a bride-to-be. Or perhaps, it is still not fully sunk in yet. I always panic at e last minute, and maybe this is no exception :) BUt I couldn't sleep the whole of last night. Prob had only 2 hrs plus of sleep......why???

Firstly, I had my henna on. I was Worried sick tat I might smudge it and yeah...I did. Comot ah ...my right palm. Desperately needs cousin to come and do some corrective work. Secondly, I was worried about my dad who was staying up at the void deck. My deco is 85% done so he wanted to be the jaga. But he was alone. So at 3:45 am when I suddenly woke up, I decided to wash off my henna and join him . Last minute bonding session... See! last minute again . .

So I have about 13 hrs or so left before we are officially legal :) I can't wait. On the other hand, I am nervous. NOt for the wedding. But whether I wld be able to fulfill my duities as wifey ( oh gosh !) well enough.

It has been raining heavily the past few days. I hope it won't rain for Saturday and Sunday. Pls pray for us.

I hope everything goes as planned and it will be a superbly joyous occasion. Insya A'llAh
You know how sometimes, e really great pple only appear in your lives much later.

I experience just that .

I had great friends from way back in RGS and they are still my fav pple now, albeit the very little time spent together. In JC , I hang out with 2 frens however, it seems that one of them is feeling rather sore abt the whole friendship. I Have no idea why. I have tried to understand but ah welll..... if one is persistent on sticking to one's opinions only , what can I say?
In my first (n current) job, I met Rat. I miss Rat. A lot. I know she is prob doing better in the other school but I miss her presence and her ever useful experiences that she shared with me.

Yesterday I had a bridal shower (so-called lah ) with A, L,W and D. Shaz joined in a while at the last minute. Frens like them make one feel very appreciated. The presents were really 'interesting' ( haha...Rat , I think u would have injectd more!) ...and I had to do some stupid dares. ALready looking stupid in the middle of Swensens with a pink tiara on my head, I had to ask guys for their phone numbers and drank cream among others. Nonsense lah they all...luckily they didn't insist on me finishing all the dares. THe fiance would never forgive me ! hahhaa..I was also made to make a minute dedication to the other half (and video-taped, of course!) to so-called express my love. Oh man...I ended up crying ...Embarrassing.. but thanks people! I never expected to find great frens at an age so old....

And of course. How could I not mention the beloved? Yes. You came into my life pretty late. BUt I would have to say that it is the greatest gift :)
uh huh....

yes. It is March . Oh gosh.... 2 weeks to go.

I hope everything goes as planned . Everyone and everything will be safe and sound. Insya'Allah.
THere would be only one issue for today's entry.

That is how glad I am to get away from this s*&$@% school .

Enuff said.
THere are a lot of things on my mind . I feel like talking about it but each time my fingers touch the keyboard, it is as if I experience 'blog-fright' (adapted from stage fright). I always get stuck and don't really know where to go from here.

The way time flies scares me sometimes. I mean, it felt like only yesterday when we welcomed in the new year. And now, we are already approaching mid-February. Where did January go? Have we been too bogged down with work that we did not even notice the time passing us by? Ok. I am crapping here. But it just scares me lah .

Look at the recent CNY hols. Pardon me, what hols?

Firstly, I fell sick. I had to attend the marriage prep course so I tried so hard to fight it. Ate medicine on time, drank lots of water ( explained the frequent toilet visits ) and just told myself to stay strong. Alhamdulillah...the course was enjoyable. The facilitators presented their lectures well and their jokes really made the whole thing pretty interesting. I didn't expect some of their activities though....like writing a doa for ur beloved and giving it to them , making a card expressing ur appreciation and expectations and many many more. I know that the beau and I do share some similarities but I didn't know it was that many or significant ....hehhee....A lot of the activities were the kinds where you write down your sentiments / opinions towards certain things etc etc, goals and then exchange.... I thought my ideas were weird at times but it turned out that it was all very much similar to his. haha. Boring couple ? Well, I prefer to see it the positive way :)

We spent the whole of Sat noon till ten pm , painting my room. It was hell fun! Parents just left us on our own so we really merepek-ed inside the room. Sing song, throw paper balls at each other and whatever not...heh .... it was so cute lah! When we were done , he just sat on the stool, drinking a cup of water with one of his legs crossed over the other ( mcm boss mana ntah ) while I tried to sweep the floor and cleaned up. He actually called out " Bik....situ belum bersih ...." Samdol betul ! :P Late supper with bro at Simpang Bedok and I only turned in at abt 2 am....

Oh well....

I need to call a meeting soon. In charge of Speech Day concert. But I am very tired lah . Wedding , danceworks (this drives me crazy!), school work , speech day , talents corner, upcoming dance public concert immediately after wedding, setting common test and exam papers...eh pengsan lah ! I haven't even mastered cooking yet and I have one month left! urrrghhhhhhhhhh.........

Someone help...............
I talked to darling Rat on the phone just now. I know I have said it before and I am going to say it again...I really really miss her.

And Rat, ur work is beautiful. My mum is nagging me to get it done asap...though I dun know what's the rush. But seriously, lawa. Mcm kamu jugak.
Oh yeah. I have been bad. Last post was Jan 5. Heh.

Best fren is married. It was a gorgeous wedding, sweet especially. Such a handsome couple. I wish them eternal happiness.

Our ROMM - Jan 26,008, 9:30 am. Done :-)